You've Got The Love
by Sybella
Summary: Nate/Serena. Hiddens momemts of N and S- one chapter for each episode. Pilot- "Her fingers ball into fist at her sides, because looking at him now as he leans against the brick wall of their school makes her want to hug him, still." Please leave feedback.
1. Chapter 1

**You've Got the Love**

A/N: Nate and Serena missing moments- I'll be writing one for each episode of gossip girl seasons one and two. This one shot takes place after Blair and Serena's show down on the steps. Title from the song of the same name by *Florence and The Machine.* Please take the time to review- feedback is the best thing for an author.

_Pilot_

Blair stalks down the steps in a huff and puff, with Kati and Iz smirking on either side, clutching her skim mocha latte to the box of invitations like it held her heart within it.

Serena's left alone at the top of the stairs, trying to pretend she isn't lonely without her friend. She tosses the yogurt into the nearest trash can. Because, really, she prefers coffee but she'd already spent too much time at the hospital with Eric, so she just grabbed the first thing she could find and a made a run for it.

She straightens out her jacket with a restrained sigh, pulling at the skewed lapels before heading to class.

There is a very familiar boy in the corner, his arms crossed and eyes distant and there's a joint lit up between his fingers but it hasn't reached his lips yet. Her heart sinks lower with every steps that she takes in his direction.

After their encounter this morning, out side the Palace Hotel- *of course* he's mad at her. He might even have the right to be, really.

She'd told him in no uncertain terms that he wasn't the reason she was home. That she didn't- she *didn't* come back for him. And then she'd flipped her long blonde hair over the shoulder of her tan leather jacket and swept past the doors without so much as a back ward glance.

He couldn't possibly know how hard it had been for her to walk through those doors, how incredibly difficult she had found it to walk away from him when every fiber in her being longed to turn around. To throw herself into his strong, safe arms. To bury her nose in his chest and smell the heady scent soap and weed that always made her feel giddy, playing havoc with her senses even faster than champagne could- that smell was just so perfect, just so *Nate*. To press her lips to his cheek and finally feel like she was back home in his embrace.

She bites her lip. Her fingers ball into fist at her sides, because looking at him now as he leans against the brick wall of their school makes her want to hug him, still.

His shoulders are stiff. He doesn't even look at her.

"Nate-" she starts softly, her heart a little bruised by his stony gaze.

He stares fixedly at the asphalt, mouth tight around the corners and she really *hates* seeing him like this.

"What is it, Serena?" His voice never used to be this cold. It echoes in her ears like something from another planet.

Her mouth drops- "Nate, I-"

"I already heard it, Serena. You didn't come for me. I get it. I don't need your sympathy." He lowers his head as he says it.

"I'm just trying to explain to you-"

He snaps, head bobbing back up and he looks almost angry, blue eyes blazing. He's never been angry before.

"So, why did you come back, Serena? If it wasn't for me and it certainly wasn't for Blair than why *did* you come back at all?"

"I'm sorry." Her voice cracks with tears and Nate just melts away, his arm reaching out to circle her shoulders. He squeezes her upper arm with own special blend of comfort and affection and both of their resistance crumbles. She turns into him, breathing in his warmth, his friendship, his misplaced love.

He sighs heavily. "Please," he says, coaxingly, "I'm sorry for how I acted. Will you just tell me what's wrong?"

Serena bites her mouth. Looks up at him with wide blue eyes, drenched in tears and her wet lashes blink fetchingly.

"It's Eric," she sobs into his jacket, "He's sick."

He frowns. He'd thought Eric was in Miami or Florida- somewhere *warm*. How could he be sick? He reaches out to dry her tears with the ends of his scarf, trying to not think about the fact that Chuck would probably strangle him for this if he caught him using the scarf as a handkerchief. Blair- shit, Blair would probably help. He casts a furtive glance around the courtyard over the top of Serena's golden hea but the bell already rang some time in between him yelling and her crying.

Serena sniffs. She doesn't cry very often. "Want to sit down?" he offers and she nods. Still wrapped up in each other, they walk to a secluded bench.

Just sitting there, buried in the ivy, with their knees brushing against each other, calms the storms in both of their hearts.

Slowly, she tells him Eric's story and Nate's eyes grow wide but he doesn't say anything, anything at all. His hand rubs circles in the small of her back as she talks, the other hand resting lightly against her legs, thinking quietly how much he loves that she leaves them bare. He likes touching her skin, all golden and warm and beautiful and she doesn't hide it the way Blair does, under silken stockings and knee high socks with lace and nonsense lining every available inch of leg.

His heart twists a little. He wants to help her, wants to go see Eric with her and hold her hand.

It isn't his place though. Serena doesn't belong to him, even if he's sure that he's always- *always* belonged to her.

She smiles, tentatively through her tears. "Thank you," she says, "For listening."

He tries to smile, as well, mouth turning. "Always," he vows.

She nods, reaches down for bag sitting next to the bench and leaps lightly to her feet. Their eyes meet as she stands above him, his hand still resting against her leg and the angle is so poignant- so *familiar* that heat flushes to their cheeks.

It's a loaded moment.

"Good bye, Nate." She whispers it, reluctant to break the spell. His hand drops away from her skin and she turns away.

Nate takes a deep breath and tosses the joint to the floor, grinding it against the pavement. He just had a shot of Serena van der Woodsen.

He doesn't need weed after that.


	2. Can't Start A Fire Without A Spark

**Can't Start A Fire Without A Spark**

A/N: Nate and Serena missing moments- One for each episode of gossip girl seasons one and two. This one shot takes place in two parts- the second of which is in between Nate asking Serena to meet him upstairs and Nate and Blair's elevator encounter. Please take the time to review- feedback is the best thing for an author and I'm really not sure I'll be writing unless I receive a certain number of reviews on this chapter. Not to mention- I'm very sick today so make me feel better with a few kind words? Title is from the Springsteen song *Dancing in the Dark*.

_The Wild Brunch_

The Captain's teachings were rather lax when it came to mending a broken heart. Flowers, candy and you won the girl back. Archibald men didn't pine. It wasn't seemly.

Archibald men didn't usually fall in love with the van der Woodsens of the world.

She left- she picked her self up and she walked away from him and she didn't look back. He'd certainly be justified if he were mad at her. Stole his virginity and stuffed into her purse with her lipstick and spun off to Connecticut. To boarding school in Connecticut where she probably swapped spit and lip color with countless other boys.

Nate shakes his head at himself- what is he even thinking? She's Serena van der Woodsen. Her mouth tasted like strawberries and champagne when he kissed her, not a hint of the stale red that Blair's little pecks leave on his lips. Serena never wears lipstick. She's entirely too perfect for it and god, does he know that.

If the Captain's teachings are lax than Chuck is always at hand to fill in the gap, so Nate heads up to Chuck's room before brunch since he's already checked in with Lily and Dan's waiting for her too. "Hair of a dog, Nathaniel," he drawls, like this is something he's done before. Something he's used to. It's really not because Chuck doesn't do pining anymore than either of their father's do.

Then again. Chuck never got to kiss Serena.

Nate downs his drink (Premium whiskey is *not* hair-of-a-dog, Chuck) and heads out the door, with his hands in buried deep in his pockets.

If he travelled to the ends of the earth and made it back alive, he wouldn't bother wondering if it had been for her. He wouldn't bother lying about it either.

* * *

"Natie." He hears a warm whisper in his ear, a brush of lips against his skin and he leans into the touch.

"Serena." It's only half moan, half ecstasy

She giggles. It doesn't take much to turn him on. She's hiding behind a cactus and whispering his childhood nickname and that's all he needs till he's half mast. (Correction- it doesn't take much for *her* to turn him on.) Blair calls for a waiter, sobering S up fast and she bites back her laugh and kicks Nate in the shins, her Christian Loboutin heel pressing up against his grey covered calf for brief second.

"You told me to meet you in Chuck's room," she hisses, dragging him behind a pillar, "I don't have the key."

He turns under her grip, blue eyes staring straight into hers and oh, god. There it is. That undeniable spark between them, flickering hard and bright. His hands find her waist and he pushes her harder against the column, his mouth twisting wickedly only inches from hers into her very favorite smile of his. Her ankles grow weak and it's a good thing he's holding her up.

"Have I told you how hot you look in that dress?" whispers Nate, all thoughts of secrecy forgotten as his mouth meets her jaw and nuzzles against it.

She gasps out in pleasure as his tongue flicks against her skin, lips wandering to the crook of her neck just beneath her chin. "No, you haven't." Her fingers wind themselves into the soft golden curls at the bottom of his hair, palm pressing into the back his throat. She breathes in time to beat of his pulse, moaning when he starts to pull up her skirt.

"Natie." No one else ever calls him that. He would hate if they did. This sweet, simple moniker belongs solely to Serena, and it fits more easily than Chuck's "Nathaniel" or Blair's "Darling" because like everything else with Serena it simply *is*, no strings or conditions attached. Right now, it's said achingly, with so much feeling that he almost stumbles back. There's his girlfriend in the room next door. There is his father and his mother and the erstwhile poet who's masquerading as Serena's date and the mere thought of that boy touching S makes Nate growl like a caveman, with blinding jealousy.

And then, all of a sudden, he just can't stand it anymore. He pulls his mouth away from her neck and brings it down over hers, kissing the very breath out of her body. And it's nothing- *nothing*- like kissing anyone else.

He hasn't had much experience. A couple of the girls under Chuck's employ and Blair- but that's it. Nate and Serena don't need skill or technique or intention when they kiss each other, his hands don't seek a reaction when they roam over her body.

When he's kissing Serena- it's all instinct. Every last, intoxicating drop it and he just wants to drown in her.

"Nate?"

Blair's crisp voice rings across the room, bouncing off the high vaulted ceilings of the lobby and the marble walls.

Nate curses softly under his breath, mouth unwilling to part from it's mate and he holds her tight for one more minute.

"You better go see what she wants."

Serena's never sounded this bitter. Nate's never felt this hurt.

"Will you meet in five minutes?" He's begging now and he isn't ashamed of it. He'd fall to his knees if he had room to move.

"Nate," she says slowly, drawing out his name and shaking her head.

"Please."

Serena bows her head and he reaches into his pocket for the key. Their bodies are still pressed up against each other and he skims his hand down the length of hers to reach the small piece of metal and he really, *really* doesn't want to let go.

"I'll see you in five," he whispers, softly and leans into the kiss her just once before detaching himself from her and sliding out from behind the column.

Blair is standing in the foyer, all chocolate curls and tapping feet with a hint of new mischief in her eyes, demanding to know where he's been. Nate doesn't dare to turn around for one last look before the endless eternity of five whole minutes.

And he doesn't see Serena wipe away a tear from her cheek, as she straightens out her dress and heads towards the elevator and room 1812.


End file.
